Melbourne's Jack Viney has been handed a two-match ban by the tribunal after being found guilty of a bump on Tom Lynch, while Richmond's Brett Deledio walked away from a striking charge with just a reprimand.
Apparently, Viney should have "pirouetted". Source: FoxSports
THE AFL Tribunal, in all its wisdom, thinks Melbourne midfielder Jack Viney should have "pirouetted" away from his bump with Adelaide's Tom Lynch.
The contact broke Lynch's jaw, and last night Viney was suspended for two games. That ban hasn't gone down well with the coaches, players or fans, who seem to think a contact sport should involve, you know, some sort of contact.
MORE: Fierce reaction to Viney's ban
MORE: 'The game is the fool here'
Maybe those critics just need to use their imaginations. We've used ours to come up with six completely serious and plausible techniques Viney could have used to avoid the collision.
1. WITH THE GRACE OF A BALLERINA
Ah, he has the poise of a young Nina Ananiashvili. Source: Supplied
2. WITH THE FLAIR OF A MATADOR
3. WITH THE WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA SPELL FROM HARRY POTTER
Photoshop. It isn't quite as easy as waving an enchanted stick. Source: Supplied
4. WITH THE DIGGING EFFICIENCY OF THAT GOPHER IN CADDYSHACK
Dig Jack, dig. Source: Supplied
5. WITH A COPPERFIELD-INSPIRED VANISHING TRICK
David Copperfield says there would have been TEN TIMES less jaw breakage. Source: AP
6. WITH THE FORCE-POWERED LEAP OF A JEDI MASTER
The Force will be with you, Jack. Always. Source: Supplied
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